Oh my god I am going to marry him. We are getting married. I'm committing to him, completely. We haven't made any plans whatsoever, but oh my god.. we're getting married. I don't quite know what we're doing.. I just really want to walk down an aisle. I want to look beautiful here and There, I want to spend the day with him, and I hope I don't cry for the wrong reasons. I hope I don't cry because I never got to see her wedding, that she can't have the ending that seems to be set up for me. I've been missing him all day, for days. It's plaguing me but I can't say anything and hurt her. I may just do a spell, to numb it out or heal it.
I wish I was better at losing people.